February 1, 2012

The Curse of Sex on the First Date

In Season 1, Episode 6 - Secret Sex some exciting things happen: Mr. Big! Miranda the Man Hater finally meets a new guy other than poor sappy Skipper (although it doesn't turn out so well in the end).
The 2nd running theme of this episode besides Secret Sex is the Rule/Curse. The Rule is that you can't sleep with a man on the first date or it will never become a relationship. The Curse is that if you have sex on the first date, he will never date you.

For the most part, I think that's a rule that men and women of society subconsciously believe and follow. Very rarely  (and I mean never) do make out sessions at the club ever lead to real dating. And I always tell my guy friends who are looking for a girlfriend - what the hell are you doing at clubs? You won't be meeting anyone that way.  A friend of a friend once honestly told me that clubbing is all about physical attraction - you don't know how dumb or boring a girl is... you only know if she's hot or not. It may not be fair - maybe it's her first act of out-of-relationship making out ever - she shouldn't be cursed or judged ... but the reality is if any sort of physical interaction happens, she is deemed unfit for girlfriend status. (And of course we judge it differently when a man vs. woman is promiscuous. But that's another rant for another time.)

To be brutally honest, as much as guys complain about being stuck on the "Friend Ladder," women just as often get categorized as either "Dateable" or "Booty Call Only."

So what's a girl to do? Sadly it seems like there are only two choices:
1) You can sleep with whoever you want on the first day. Enjoy yourself. Maybe you'll get lucky like Carrie and find a Mr. Big.
2) You can follow the Rule and wait to jump his bones til the 2nd date or 22nd date or whenever. 99% chance of him taking you more seriously.

1 comment: